Sarcastic Passive: From the Jeremy R. Gilby Dictionary Patent Pending

The form of speech involving slight undertones in satire, irony, and cutting jibs, slight enough to be noticed afterwards, but obscure enough to be hidden in the present tense of conversation.

I’ve changed enough tires in my day (my own and those of other people) to become quite proficient in the removal and replacement of a standard tire.

So when I was driving home from church this morning, I was only slightly bothered by the fact that I punctured my tire.
Fortunately, I was at the location I was intending to travel to, so the inconvenience was minimal.

The only thing that slowed me down was the fact that I had to “unpack” the seemingly new jack and spare from the trunk of my car. (Under all the saxophones of course).

Well, that and a panhandler.
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The National Football Conference: East Division, has historically been one of the more challenging divsions in the National Football Leage:

• The Philadelphia Eagles
• The Most Hated Team in All of Football
• The Pesky New [Jersey] Giants
• The frustrating Washington Redskins

While these might not always be the biggest teams in Football, the Division Title is always a heated race.
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Hey, did ya vote yet?
Are you planning on voting?
Are you going to vote ever?

Well, I ain’t sleepy neither.

Not quite from Casablanca, but close enough for government work

Speaking of Governmnet work….
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Here they are, the Search Results for Jeremy-Gilby-Dot-Com, for the month of October.

For those of you who came in late, this is a regular article which appears, listing the top 20 search strings used to find Jeremy-Gilby-Dot-Com via the various search engines on the world wide web.

Sometimes these are funny, other times they are stupid, and most times, they are just there.

Now, on to the checking:
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I’ve wanted to see this Bogie movie for a long time, and now that it has come out on DVD, To Have and Have Not on my “Want to own” list. I’ve wanted to see this movie because it not only stars Humphrey Bogart, but it is the FIRST movie of the real life “Mrs. Humphrey Bogart” Lauren Bacall.

And this movie is well known because in this movie, the two stars met, and fell in love.

And during the shooting, you can see how these actors grow closer and closer, until ultimately, 2 years later, they wed.
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As some of you know, my Cubicle Node loves Homestar-runner-dot-com, and the antics of everyone’s favorite semi-professional Lucha Libre, Strong Bad, and the “weakly” Strong Bad E-mails.

Well, there was a rumor running around the mill that the Brothers Chaps are putting together a Strong Bad themed CD!

I’m SO buying this!

Updated: 3:30 PM PST
Updated: 4:45 PM PST
Updated: 5:00 PM PST
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Egads, just when I think the Philadelphia Eagles are down and out. They continue to win.

That is four straight.
That is four straight come-from-behind victories in the Fourth Quarter. (3 of those wins were on-the-road, including this one on Monday Night.)
That is grounds for my lawsuit for the Eagles giving me stomach ulcers!
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My Cubicle Jungle doesn’t get Veteran’s Day off, but I took the day off anyway.

After last week, my boss and I figured I needed another day to unwind.
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For those of you who came in late: I hate Apple Macintosh desk clutter.
I refuse to call these things computers, because its not a computer, its an internet appliance, that’s all.

Anyways, as some of you recall, I formatted my iMac, and installed Yellow Dog.
And with the genius of the Mac-On-Linux people, I can still run my Mac programs, so that I can still do my job.

But instead of having an overpriced MP3 player on my desk, I have a real computer.

A REAL ONE.

Some of you have asked for screen shots, to see what I’m talking about, so here ya go:
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What do you get when you mix 3 Mini-Coopers, A traffic jam, and millions of dollars in Italian Gold?

And what do you get when you add Micheal Caine?

Huh? Micheal Cane?

Yes, as Charlie Crocker.

Wait, don’t I mean Mark Wahlberg?

No, I mean the The Italian Job.
Not, The Italian Job.

You see, there is a difference!

*********SPOILERS BELOW*********
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After reading Jen Speaks this morning, I decided to go on a lonely quest for the current worldview on what is normal behavior for coffee consumption.

Some people would call me obsessed. *I’m looking at you Allison*
At this point, I don’t care.

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This isn’t happening. (Though I’m glad it is)

The Eagles have won five straight. (That’s good in anybody’s standings)

And this team used to be 0-2 and shut out, at home, their first game.

Philly baby! These times they are a changing.

And the [New Jersey] Giants are aching (again)

(Told ya sis!)
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Just a note, America’s most disliked team (The Cowboys) just had their A– uh -er Attitudes handed to them by “America’s Team” the New England Patriots.

That means both the Cow[girls] and the Eagles are tied for first place in the NFC:East. (At 7-3)

And Dallas goes to play another tough game against the 8-2 Carolina Panthers, while the Eagles take on the visiting Saints as they try to march into the Link.

Could be a change in the Winner’s circle next week.
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I follishly took this political survey:

And the results I got were as I figured:

1. left/right +6.1213 (+0.3685) Meaning, I lean far to the right
2. pragmatism -1.7354 (-0.1045) Meaning, that I’m not an athiest/universalist and I’m biased to Judeo/Christian Fundamentals.
   Once upon a time, I might have scored higher here.

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I kicked back and enjoied another Bogie movie last night, Key Largo. The movie puts The Greatest Actor of all time with Edward G. Robinson, and the match is a good pair on the screen.

This movie was a bit different from the Bogart “Tough Guy” era. Here, the touch Bogie-like character is placed with the Robinson “Mob” image, and the script comes off nicely.

Lauren Bacall is along for the ride, as is Lionel Barrymore, and all four actors put on quite a performace.

And unlike other Bogart/Bacall films, there is very little romance between the two actors. It was expected and missed.

/////////////////////// SPOILERS BELOW //////////////////////////////
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Its time again for another favorite monthly installment on the current deployments of the largest moving manmade objects on the planet, the U.S. Navy SuperCarriers.

One has just come home, and one is getting ready to deploy to take her place.

Sources: navy.mil
GlobalSecurity.org
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So there I was, 8:30 PM, last night, when my telephone line rings. The Caller ID says “Private Name” and “Private Number” so I’m hesitant to answer. But my Caller ID has been getting a lot of these, and I’m curious as to who they are (and if they have a legal right to be harrasing my poor little phone line.)

So I answer:

Warning: If you are in Sales (especially in training), you should not read on
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For those of you who came in late, I’m tall, not REALLY tall, but Six-foot-four tall. Taller then most, but at the same time not taller then all.

One of the main irks I have is when people say, “You are so lucky to be tall!”
My reply is often, “No, its not luck, its a curse. You are lucky to be short.”
They look at me funny, and scowl, and reply, “You’re full of it, tall boy, being short sucks.”
Then I lay it on them.
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Disclaimer: I may be a product of the University of Arizona, and live in a PAC-10 town, but I was born a Michigan Wolverine.

The University of Michigan Wolverines done wooped up on those nasty Buckeyes of “The Ohio State University”.

And in the process, took the BIG-10 title, and unless some annoying little BCS mammajamma-goings-on occur, the Wolverines are going to the Rose Bowl.

YAY!
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My Roommate, Matt is playing one of my favorite movie quote games:

I love this game!

Feel free to play along!

I saw this article on h-t-t-p-colon-forward-slash-forward-slash-slash-dot-dot-org.
The terminology of Master/Slave has been Banned in LA County California.

The article was filed under “humor”, but its far from funny. I wish it was a joke.
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Its here!

I thought I’d give a review of the CD, as it recently came in the mail, and I’ve been conversing with my co-workers over it.
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Its Thanksgiving Eve, and around here, its the official start of the Holiday Season.

This means, that I make a trip to the local Grocery Store, and pick up some Holiday necessities:

• Eggnog
• Brandy
• Rum
• Cider
• Spices

Holiday

Holiday

Holiday!

HOLIDAY
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Jeremy-Gilby-Dot-Com wishes you and yours, a very happy Thanksgiving.

Several Hundred Years ago, some brave men and women crossed the uncharted waters of the Atlantic Ocean, and laid a seed bed for what would be the greatest nation to bless the planet Earth.

Its a day to be thankful and a day to remember.

And a day to tell someone you love them.

Share and Enjoy!

You might remember my Previous Post last year regarding the dark dark day of Black Friday.

For those of you who came in late, it is an understatement to say that I’m not a big fan of marketing.

For those of you who came in REALLY late, you might not know that in my first months in Arizona, I was scarred for life by a particular song.

I’d thought I’d merge them together.
(Yeah, this is for you Tim.)
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This morning I treated myself to another Bogie Movie, one of his Columbia Pictures: The Caine Mutiny.

While Humphrey Bogart is top billing, his screen time is minimal. And while this isn’t one of his best acting stints, the movie is quite good.

Based on a true story, the Caine Mutiny has Action, Drama, Suspense, and a coming of age for a new actor on the block.

——–Spoilers Below—————–
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I just finished the latest Clancy Paperback, Red Rabbit. Its a 618 pages (a magazine article compared to Clancy’s other novels). For me it started out slow, but about a third of the way through, after the reader gets their bearings. But for a Jack Ryan novel, there was too much Jack Ryan in the book, for my tastes.

Although, the book was still very tempting, as it hinged between fact and fiction.

—————Spoilers Below—————–
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Well, some of you may remember my flat tire, punctuated by a steriotypical panhandler, and some Sarcastic Pacifism on my part.

Well, I was at the same Carl’s Jr., with the same car, and wouldn’t you know it, the same bum showed up.
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As you already know, I have a customizable vocabulary.

Today, as “The band” and I were commenting about Thanksgiving Dinner, I ushered in the new word that I created on the spot: